Are you treating your dog fairly, or should you adjust your expectations?
Here’s why you should stop.
Now, I understand this is easier said than done; it’s tricky. Take it from someone who finds herself at times comparing against all the amazing dog behaviourists and trainers out there. However, I must emphasize that while it’s good to be inspired, it’s not healthy to compare and doesn’t bring any benefits. That’s why it’s crucial not to compare your dog with another. I know it’s human nature, and we tend to do this in our personal lives, not to mention on our training journey with our dogs. The trouble arises because when we compare our dog’s skills and progress with another or ourselves with another owner or professional, it does us an injustice and can significantly impact our progress and relationship.
Even if you’re comparing your dog to another say a previous one or a dog of the same breed. Firstly if it’s an older dog that has past and you have a puppy, you may not truly remember the puppy or adolescent stages with the original dog or perhaps your children have all grown up and moved out and they were the ones that were entertaining the older dog when they were a puppy most of the time.
If for example you have a spaniel and you compare it against say someone walking their German Shepherd down the road, there’s a massive difference in their walking style. Spaniels cover ground when working as gun dogs in a zig zag type fashion, German Shepherds tend to sheep along perimeter lines, so is this a realistic comparison? If you are watching another dog that appears to be behaving how can you be sure it is not doing so because it is scared, or has an underlying health condition, or is that just their nature.
Dogs have different learning styles just like us, for example some focus on movement so if whilst teaching you are constantly moving your hands around, this makes it difficult for the dog to know what to focus on. But clear visual signals can help. Other dogs respond better to verbal cues, there are even dogs that learn from watching and then copying.
Researching what your dog was bred for can help you understand their learning style better but each dog has their own preference too. Dogs also learn at different rates, some get frustrated easy so we need to break tasks down, others get distracted easily so we need to keep motivation high or train initially somewhere quiet. Many dogs can be one step a head and can end up learning something different than we expected. This happens to dog trainers and behaviourists too so you are not alone.
As a professional I always focus on the dog in front of me and it’s vital we go at that dogs pace.
If you have been working hard with your dog it doesn’t mean that you’re doing something wrong, dogs are not blank slates. Even if you get your puppy at eight weeks they’ve had eight weeks of learning history before getting to you, before that there’s hereditary and genetic factors and even the stress of the mum during pregnancy will impact how your dog is doing with the world around them, which in turn impacts learning results.
Sadly we are in a society that wants quick fixes for everything, however the instant solutions you might observe on tv or social media usually have an aversive or punishing component, which has a detrimental effect long term on your dogs emotional state and can lead to further unwanted and sometimes dangerous behaviour.
When you’re comparing your dog what happens is you stop listening, you stop listening to when your dog is not comfortable with something or is finding the training difficult or is not getting it. Therefore frustration and even anger can start to arise.
If we take lead walking, for example, there are so many factors influencing your dog walking beside you on lead. Take pace for instance, some dogs cannot walk at the pace we are walking at. If you think about someone who walks slower than you naturally you walk faster and it’s hard to maintain their pace. If your dog is anxious they are going to want to move quickly in an environment, they may sniff the environment briefly and want to get back to their safe place as soon as possible. There’s so much they’re trying to take in and if they’re scared they’re gonna wanna walk quicker. There are multiple reasons why dogs pull.
What ever you are trying to train I urge you to try and take a step back and take one day at a time with your training, watch the dog in front of you and be kind to your self. Be mindful of how you are feeling and what mood you are in, dogs are sensitive to our mood states and it will affect their behaviour. It’s good to sometimes just spending time with your dog without doing anything specific, spending quality time without constant training. If you’ve just had a stressful day at work and then decided to take your dog out on a walk and you are still working on lead walking you might find your patience is shorter. You are not setting your dog up for success for learning and you’re putting yourself under pressure so either don’t take your dog out that day, choose a different time or just use this time to simply enjoy your dogs company.
Consider where you are getting your behaviour or training support from. Researching advice off of the internet can be detrimental to your success and will put your techniques into conflict, causing your dog to be more confused.
There is not a one size fits all approach to Dog Behaviour and Training, despite what you might see on TikTok, Facebook, Snapchat, or other media platforms. That’s why seeking guidance from a professional who can work with you individually, understanding your environment, your dog, your needs, and expectations, is more effective. They can help you set and achieve goals, considering the pace of both you and your dog.
Take a moment to step back, observe your actions from an outsider’s perspective, and if needed, seek support. Even a phone advice session with a trainer or behaviourist can provide valuable insights into what might not be working.
If you would like to chat with me or get support with your dog or puppy book in a call with me below.
